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Top Five Cube Etiquette Violations

Note: While some of these behaviors are not offensive on an occasional basis (I've done some of 'em myself in certain situations) they do rise to the level of serious cubicle etiquette violations when done on a regular and sustained basis.

Etiquette Violation 1: Using your speaker phone to have a conference call by yourself or to check your voicemail
What you want to say, but can't:  Follow these simple directions.   Reach for telephone receiver.  Use hand to grasp receiver.  Use arm to place receiver against ear.  Talk, listen.  Repeat as necessary.

Etiquette Violation 2
: Loud conversations about personal issues

What you want to say, but can't: Wow, that rash couldn't have flared up in a worse spot, wanna keep it to yourself next time?

Etiquette Violation 3: Being a "LOUD TALKER!"
What you want to say, but can't: Easy tiger, everyone can hear you just fine, could you just turn it down a couple of notches?

Etiquette Violation 4: Sneaking up on people with their backs facing the entrance to their cube
What you want to say, but can't: You better hope the next time you do that, I'm not overcaffeinated and using a pair of scissors because there's no telling what I might do when I'm startled.

Etiquette Violation 5: Eating hot and/or particularly smelly food at your desk
What you want to say, but can't: It's really great that you brought in flounder leftovers from dinner last night, but it smells like a fish market in here now.